"Dementia is easy to say and easy to write but not so easy to understand"
Having my mum live with me.
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My currently lives in the states. I will be going to get her in August of this year, she is looking forward to coming home. She was diagnosed with alcohol related dementia in 1996 and has been in residential care since. She is 66 now and I want to her to spend
her twilight years back home in Scotland. She is adament about wanting to stay with me. as she has had enough with care homes. The only problem is that I currently work away, although my partner will be there for her. I want to find out about getting her into a day centre during the week, so my partner can work and attend college. I have no clue where to start. To be honest I am looking forward to having my mum stay with us, I know it will be hard work. I just need to find out where she can go during the day. Interacting with others would be good for her, as she is very friendly. She can also do alot of things for herself, such as bathing and dressing. i wouldn't let her near the cooker though. If anyone could offer any information I would greatly appreciate it.
Thank you.
her twilight years back home in Scotland. She is adament about wanting to stay with me. as she has had enough with care homes. The only problem is that I currently work away, although my partner will be there for her. I want to find out about getting her into a day centre during the week, so my partner can work and attend college. I have no clue where to start. To be honest I am looking forward to having my mum stay with us, I know it will be hard work. I just need to find out where she can go during the day. Interacting with others would be good for her, as she is very friendly. She can also do alot of things for herself, such as bathing and dressing. i wouldn't let her near the cooker though. If anyone could offer any information I would greatly appreciate it.
Thank you.
Hello Jim.
Your email has come up twice so I shall answer this one!
I'll give what suggestions I can but as I say in my introduction I am not a professional so you will probably get better advice elsewhere. Here in Wales our system may well be different from yours in Scotland so I can only say what I would do.
Firstly I would make sure that you have got written and signed documentation from America verifying your mother's state of health. You wouldn't want to have to go through the misery of taking her through all those tests again when you bring your mother back home.
If it was me I would go to your GP, explain the situation and he should be able to help you. Failing that why not try your local Alzheimer's socioty. Here the Alzheimer's society is an umbrella name for a society who give lots of help for people with all types of dementia. Their carers too. They will be able to point you in the right direction.
Here in Wales we have a joint health and social service team called the 'Community Mental Health Services for Older People'. Find out if you have a similar set up there. They would be extremely useful for you.
I don't know if day care would be available for five days and I don't know how well the pick up and return works in your part of the world but any of the groups I've described should be able to help.
I'm a bit concered at you concern regarding your Mum and the cooker, though. Why not find out through social services if there is some sort of locking device you can get hold of for the cooker - I believe there is. It didn't worry me with my husband as he never did know how to use the cooker even when he was well!!!
It gets trickier as time goes on as there will come a time when your Mum will not be able to be left unattended. Be warned!! It is far better if you can plan ahead now as it will be harder, both practically and emotionally, for you to deal it with once she is here.
Well Jimm, that's about the best advice I can give you and your partner. If you get stuck on anything more specific email again and I'll pull in outside help. All the very best. I can well understand you wanting to bring your Mum home. Its hard work but not something you will ever regret - of that I am sure.
All the best
Jill.
Your email has come up twice so I shall answer this one!
I'll give what suggestions I can but as I say in my introduction I am not a professional so you will probably get better advice elsewhere. Here in Wales our system may well be different from yours in Scotland so I can only say what I would do.
Firstly I would make sure that you have got written and signed documentation from America verifying your mother's state of health. You wouldn't want to have to go through the misery of taking her through all those tests again when you bring your mother back home.
If it was me I would go to your GP, explain the situation and he should be able to help you. Failing that why not try your local Alzheimer's socioty. Here the Alzheimer's society is an umbrella name for a society who give lots of help for people with all types of dementia. Their carers too. They will be able to point you in the right direction.
Here in Wales we have a joint health and social service team called the 'Community Mental Health Services for Older People'. Find out if you have a similar set up there. They would be extremely useful for you.
I don't know if day care would be available for five days and I don't know how well the pick up and return works in your part of the world but any of the groups I've described should be able to help.
I'm a bit concered at you concern regarding your Mum and the cooker, though. Why not find out through social services if there is some sort of locking device you can get hold of for the cooker - I believe there is. It didn't worry me with my husband as he never did know how to use the cooker even when he was well!!!
It gets trickier as time goes on as there will come a time when your Mum will not be able to be left unattended. Be warned!! It is far better if you can plan ahead now as it will be harder, both practically and emotionally, for you to deal it with once she is here.
Well Jimm, that's about the best advice I can give you and your partner. If you get stuck on anything more specific email again and I'll pull in outside help. All the very best. I can well understand you wanting to bring your Mum home. Its hard work but not something you will ever regret - of that I am sure.
All the best
Jill.
Hi Jim,
I agree with what Jill has advised you - i think it is sound advice. I also wanted to say that the Princess Royal Trust for Carers is an excellent organisation. They cover the whole of the UK and will have a lot of advice about the support you can receive as a carer.
If you contact your local council's contact & assessment team or the older people's support team they should be able to help. As well as having assessments for your mother, you should be entitled to have a Carers Assessment completed by a social worker that will look at your individual circumstances.
I also live in Wales but I am assuming this is the same in Scotland.
I hope this helps
All the best
Dave
I agree with what Jill has advised you - i think it is sound advice. I also wanted to say that the Princess Royal Trust for Carers is an excellent organisation. They cover the whole of the UK and will have a lot of advice about the support you can receive as a carer.
If you contact your local council's contact & assessment team or the older people's support team they should be able to help. As well as having assessments for your mother, you should be entitled to have a Carers Assessment completed by a social worker that will look at your individual circumstances.
I also live in Wales but I am assuming this is the same in Scotland.
I hope this helps
All the best
Dave
